Christian Community

Many of us take it for granted that our churches are warm and friendly. Yet the reality is that our hospitality is often not as deep as we think that it is. While there are many different factors that cause people to try out a congregation, it’s almost always true that they will not return unless they feel warmly welcomed. And true biblical hospitality goes far beyond a handshake; biblical hospitality should run through the entire life of the congregation. This true or false quiz may be a helpful check-up for you and for your congregation.

True	False	1.Most people want to be introduced to the whole congregation the first time they attend a worship service. Christian Community’s research shows that only about one-third of first-time visitors want to be introduced to the whole congregation. Two-thirds definitely do not want to be put on the spot with such an introduction. If you are in a very large congregation, it probably isn’t realistic to have people introduced to the whole church during worship; but even in a very small congregation, it’s not a good idea to automatically introduce visitors.
True	False	2. In today’s culture, people will think you are being too pushy if you extend an invitation to brunch or dinner the first time you meet them in a worship service. While not everyone will accept such an invitation the first time it is extended, virtually everyone appreciates being invited to share in brunch or in dinner. Growing churches have a congregational culture in which people are very quick to extend invitations to meals to those who visit.
True	False	3. Name tags annoy some of us, but they are still a very good thing both for visitors and for long-time members. Name tags do annoy many of us! But they are virtually invaluable for visitors, and they are also a help to long-time members. Unless your congregation is very small, many of your members do not know each other–though some may be embarrassed to admit it. Name tags help everyone.
True	False	4. The best follow-up to a visitor to church is a personal letter from the pastor. A letter from the pastor is fine, but the best follow-up is a visit from someone in the congregation. Growing churches tend to have a follow-up visit made within 48-hours of the time a person visits the church. Usually this is for the purpose of bringing a gift like homemade bread, cookies, a coffee mug, or a devotional book – perhaps also with some printed information about the church. There’s no need to go inside the home for a visit–simply come to the door, share the gift and thanks for the person or family having attended, and leave. If the person being visited wants to talk more, fine. But the short visit accompanied by a gift can have great power.
True	False	5. Most people visit churches today because of radio and television advertisements. Most people visit churches for the first time because a family member, friend, coworker, or neighbor invited them to come. Radio and television ads have impact in some urban areas, but most churches can’t afford enough air time to have any significant impact. The person-to-person approach is the best one–and the most hospitable one!
True	False	6. In conversations with first-time visitors to worship, church school, or other activities, be careful not to ask questions that put the other person on the spot. Of course! But we often violate this obvious guideline. There is a natural tendency in many of our traditions to ask repeated questions to discover whether or not we know the family of the person who is visiting. But that makes it sound like we aren’t really interested in the visitor unless we have some kind of family tie. Another common error comes in assuming that an adult visitor accompanied by a child must have a spouse who is not along. We are living in a time with many single parents, who will not appreciate the assumption that they have a spouse.
True	False	7. Only about one in five churches provide any training to greeters or ushers on how to respond to children. According to a Christian Community study, only about 20% of churches provide greeters and ushers with any training on how to relate to children. The result is that children are often ignored or annoyed by a condescending adult who gives a pat on the head! Greeters and ushers should acknowledge children with direct eye contact and with the same interest and courtesy extended to adults. It’s very good for an usher to bend down to greet a young child on his or her level.
True	False	8. Younger adults are more likely than older adults to have accepting attitudes toward persons of homosexual orientation and toward persons living together who are not married. Christian Community’s research makes it clear that, on the whole, younger adults are far more accepting of persons of homosexual orientation and of persons living together who are not married. And more and more persons of homosexual orientation are being open about that just as more and more opposite sex couples feel comfortable living together before they are married. Obviously there are complex theological issues concerning these things, but many churches are rethinking these issues. Most growing churches show hospitality and acceptance toward all people who come to worship.
True	False	9. Most churches are not actually as friendly as they think they are. Christian Community has done surveys of the active membership of over 1,400 congregations. In more than 90% of the churches, we have found that visitors and newer members do not think the church has as warm hospitality as long-time members think it does. That’s why we so enthusiastically urge churches to do a congregation-wide study of our book Widening the Welcome of Your Church.
True	False	10. Most visitors to churches today want to get lost in a large crowd and to be left alone. It is true that there are people who visit churches who want to have a sense of anonymity, and those persons are especially likely to seek out very large congregations where it feels easier to keep a low initial profile. But most visitors to most churches are hungry for a connection with others. They may be shy in social settings and not take the initiative, but most people want to connect with others. While it is true that two-third of first-time visitors do not want to be introduced to the whole congregation, that doesn’t mean they want to be ignored! They anticipate and hope that those around them will greet them and make them feel welcome.